How to Become HER (Part 4/5): The Real Secret to Lasting Self-Confidence

In my nearly decade of working with high-achieving women, I’ve seen the same patterns again and again, and that's why I decided to create this How to Become HER mini-series—to help you break free from the patterns and step into the highest version of yourself before we end the year.

Firstly, in case you missed it, here are the first three posts that will provide more layers to what I'm going to share with you today:

#1. Why Being Around the Right Women Quantum Leaps You

#2. Nervous System Habits That Anchor Your Next Level

#3. Heal Your Money Trauma & Build Wealth That Feels Safe to Hold

Now, what I've loved hearing from you ladies so far is that this series lit a serious fire under your ass to finish this year strong. There's no "throwing in the towel" or calling this year a wash. You still have time to become HER—to show up for yourself fully and follow through on your word.

So, to continue this series and keep that fire red hot... here is a self-confidence nugget for you!

Confidence doesn’t just come from healing your trauma—it’s built through integrity with yourself.

Healing creates internal safety, but self-trust and a sense of unshakeable confidence is built through repetition and reliability.

I’ve seen the same pattern again and again with the high-achieving women I work with: they show up with integrity for their job, their relationship and other people, but they don't do that for themselves. They've lost their self-confidence along the way, and whilst they might seem confident (outspoken, authoritative, good at work), they don't have deep self-confidence (where they actually have their own back).

Confidence is built through follow-through. It’s created every time you do what you said you would do, even when it’s inconvenient.

Every time you follow through, your body receives proof:

• “I have my own back.”

• “I don't abandon my own needs.”

• “I keep my word.”

And that’s when you start to feel like the woman who actually has her own back.

Because true self-confidence doesn't just come from healing the wounds that caused you to be self-conscious. It's also about embodied evidence that you are the kind of woman who can rely on herself.

That’s the second phase of my H.E.R. Framework™—Embody.

This is where you actually integrate what you've healed and live it out. You're no longer having to manage your triggers and breathe through them... you don't get triggered by someone questioning you at all anymore.

Confidence doesn’t come from waiting for the right time. It comes from showing your body that you’re the kind of woman who moves before she feels ready. Because the day of feeling "ready" will never come. You won't ever feel "ready," you just instead decide that you're going to do it anyway because you want the outcome.

Healing makes you safe. Embodiment makes you unstoppable. And that's when you start to radiate.

So, what's one thing you're going to follow through on this week? One act of self-integrity that builds self-confidence. Because if you're serious about becoming HER by the end of 2025, you're not waiting to feel ready. You're ready to act now.

In HER Year, I'm inviting you to come with me as I step into the most growth-filled, identity-shifting chapter of my life. I’m navigating motherhood, expanding my business, and keeping deep polarity in my marriage—and I want you to walk beside me as I embody what it means to be HER when the circumstances aren’t “perfect.”

You'll learn my real-time practices, systems, and mindset and body shifts for staying regulated, feminine, and abundant—even when I have less time, no morning routine, and am sometimes running on just 4 hours of sleep.

Let me be your living expander. Because if I can do it, you absolutely can too!