An article by Monica Yates published in Thrive Global Magazine:
Being feminine, doesn’t mean you are giving away your power to men.
I’m giving you permission to NOT be a hard core feminist.
Yes, you heard me right. I know, that’s taboo and rocks the boat. I'm here to welcome that controversy.
I know this because I used to be one.
In my teenage years, I had the mentality that women are the bees knees and all men are well, quite the opposite. I had plenty of relationships where I emasculated men, put my work above everything and always thought men just wanted one thing. And it didn’t get me anywhere. The reality was that I was cold and I thought that feminine energy was weak.
I was wrong.
I grew up with the phrase in my head of “next time I’m coming back as a man,” that men had it easier than women, and that being a woman was hard, unfair, and no fun.
Well, now I'm the opposite and I've helped thousands of women swap their perspective too.
And the result? I’ve never been so happy, open, free, peaceful and nourished in my body as I am now.
I’m not going to lie, letting go of the maculine armor that I wore my whole life was hard. AND it was the best thing I could have ever done for myself.
In society, women that are #girlbosses, running fortune 500’s and ‘beating men’ are praised. And somehow if you are a stay at home mum, or a woman that wants to let her man lead, you are accepting the patriarchy and “behind the times”.
While it might be the opposite of modern society’s norm. It’s the TRUTH of our soul and energy as a feminine being.
You see, as a woman, 90% of us have feminine core energy, and 10% of us have masculine core energy. So if you are in the 90%, your deepest desire is to be taken care of. Under all the ego and the part of you that doesn’t want to admit it, if you are honest with yourself, there is nothing that feels better than being in the masculine's arms. Am I right? I am right. Thank you. (This goes for same-sex couples too. If you are the feminine, you'll crave the masculine pole from your partner).
So I'm talking to the 90% of us here. Being told to hustle, push and beat men is making us more disconnected from our hearts, unhappy as fuck and we are actually not succeeding at life. It means that women are getting to 35 only to realise how unhappy they are and then having SO much pressure on them (thanks to a ticking biological clock) to find the man and have the family (if that’s what they want). It leaves women feeling broken, DEEPLY sad and as a result, covering it up by working harder and thinking that if they bury themselves in work they’ll be happy.
In reality, it means that they are getting those ‘feel good feelings’ from work wins, because they aren’t getting them from a deeply, soul-filling relationship.
Listen, there are a million tangents that also need to go in this article, but for now, I want you to let go of judgement and defensiveness and stop for a second ... and really think and feel this, does this, deep down, land for you.
I’ve helped thousands of women realize how their bodies are CRAVING for them to surrender into their feminine.
Their wounds and conditioning tells them that surrendering and being in the feminine is weak and that letting a man lead is ‘submissive’ (in a bad way). Instead of us being educated about how the feminine and masculine dance together to create ultimate bliss.
Here are your top things things to start embodying and doing as a woman in her power, that also receives from men:
. Just say thank you when a man opens the door. No internal dialogue needed. Just receive it!
2. You play to your strengths as a woman, and let the men in your life play to their strengths.
3. Work on embodying your feminine energy and stop grinding yourself to the core as a way to get validation from dad (yes it’s generally a daddy wound).
This isn't about giving your power away. This is about coming back to the truth of being a feminine woman. That after a long workday, we want to be looked after. We know how to hold open our own door (I mean we can handle giving birth ... so we have the ‘strength’ thing sorted), but it’s more fun and enjoyable when someone does it for us. Let’s be honest nothing in the world feels better than being able to let go of control, knowing
that someone else is in control.
The feminist movement was created to have EQUALITY between men and women, and now all I see is women bad-mouthing men and thinking that they are all bad. Men feel lost because they want to lead, but never know if a woman will take offense to it. Women complain about how there are ‘no good men’ yet we don’t actually know how to receive from men. The feminist movement has, in my eyes, become a witch hunt towards men instead of creating equality in work and home lives. And just to finish this off with another boat rocking statement -- let's just get one thing straight. Men and women will never be the same. Trying to create a perfect ‘equal’ is like trying to get blood from a stone. Men and women’s brains are literally hardwired in a different way.
So here is what some would consider a radical idea, what if instead of trying to make us the ‘same,’ we learned how to celebrate our differences and let men be in their power, and women be in our power?