Everything You Need To Know While Going Through an Abortion

If you're reading this, you may be facing a deeply challenging time in your life. Maybe it was an easy decision for you, but it's still something horrible that you even have to go through, and it's important to honor that. Maybe this was an extremely hard decision for you, but deep down, it does feel right. 

First things first. It doesn't matter what your reasoning is. It's YOURS, and it's valid. 

I've worked with enough people to know that humans are complex beings. there is no such thing as 'right' and 'wrong.' Things are not black and white. Your experience is INCREDIBLEY valid, even if you're telling yourself otherwise. 

Don't judge yourself, shame yourself, or beat yourself up right now. You need nourishment. Physically and energetically. Because whether or not this was an easy decision for you, this SUCKS that you have to go through this. 

Even if you have a good experience with your termination, it's traumatic. It's heavy, it's emotional, and it's heartbreaking. It can make you feel incredibly emotional in the times you go to have sex following the healing of the abortion. You might feel heavy grief that you don't understand, and you might even second-guess yourself. 

What I want you to know is that you will get through this. It will all make sense, and you need to honor YOURSELF, your decision, your heart, and your future right now. 

Even if you want to be a mum one day, maybe right now won't allow you to be the best mum you could be. That's okay! 

Maybe you're already a mother, and you truly do not want to have another child. That's also perfectly fine. You end up resenting your child subconsciously because you feel like you "should" go through with the pregnancy, but it won't end in a better outcome. 

The soul of this child will come back to you if they're meant to be your child. Otherwise, they will go to the parents that they're meant to be with. Sometimes, souls get lost and go to the wrong parents, or they get a little excited, and you have to ask them to be patient. 

No matter what your situation is, it'll all work out. 

It is important, however, to consider doing some trauma healing around this because no matter how self-aware you are or how 'okay' you are with this decision, it's a big thing for your body, heart, womb, and cervix. Inside my program, Queen Alchemy, we have a mini trauma call for healing abortions that you can attend if you join the program or if you are a past client. 

Now, onto the physical things... 

Even though you are not planning to keep this fetus or embryo, it doesn't mean you don't need to nourish yourself. Your body is going through a lot right now. Your blood volume is rising; your body is increasing its progesterone and estrogen, and the neural tube, which will become the brain and spinal cord, begins to form, as do the heart, digestive system, and some other organs.

So whether or not you plan to birth this baby, you need to nourish YOUR SELF to keep up with this. This will mean that you'll be less depleted between now and when you get the

termination and after the termination. So yes, start taking prenatal choline and magnesium glycinate and eating chicken liver by putting it in homemade Bolognese sauce. You might even need to have naps during the day or take it easier. Just because you're not following through with the pregnancy doesn't mean you shouldn't honour the fact that you are pregnant right now, and your body might be feeling incredibly tired and worn out from all the hard work it's doing.

By upping your nutrients now, you're helping your body to 'bounce back' faster after all of this and re-balance its hormones. 

My supplement recommendations: 

I've been asked a few times if it's better to take the medication or do a D&C. If you can do the medication, I would advise that from the premise that it's less traumatising physically on the body., You do bleed for longer (up to weeks), and you can, at a point, see a lump of "gunk," let's just say, come out of you. However, it's less physically traumatizing on your cervix and nervous system than having a D&C (which involves you going under and scraping the lining of your uterus). 

If you choose to take the medication, we want to flush that sh*t out of you ASAP and re-balance your hormones to get your cycle back on track STAT. If you are doing the D&C, you're still going to have the anesthesia, and you want to flush out the hormones that your body has been making in the weeks you've been pregnant. 

So, in the days leading up to the appointment, start taking DIM and Super Greens  to get your liver going and boost your detox pathways. Make sure you're drinking lots of filtered water and reducing your stress as much as possible. Taking 400mg of Magnesium Glycinate a day will help your body reduce stress and not feel as stressed. Increase bone broth,  glutamine, and sleep to support your body in what's about to come. 

After you've taken the pills, start sending all the love to your womb. This isn't the time for you to punish yourself or feel guilty. Support your body. If you want to be a mum one day, or it feels right to do so, talk to the soul of this baby and ask him or her to come back when you're ready. She/he is loved, and you're sorry that now wasn't the right time, and you cannot wait to meet him/her in the near future. Send golden light to your womb space and even have a womb compress, or sit a warm cup of tea (still holding it) in your womb space to get the blood flowing there. 

You want to be keeping your body and your womb warm during this time. Warm baths, heat packs, socks on your feet, etc. This will boost your blood flow and help things move through more quickly. I also recommend drinking yarrow tea, nettle tea, and raspberry leaf tea to support your feminine essence during this time. Go to bed early, cry if you need to, and just honour everything you're feeling right now. No matter what your mind is saying, just let yourself feel and process the grief of this decision, the grief of having to go through this, the grief of even having to make this decision. 

EVERYTHING YOUR FEELING IS VALID AND OKAY TO FEEL. You are HUMAN. 

Continue to have DIM and lots of vegetables, water, bone broth, vitamin C, and your prenatal to support the detoxification of the pregnancy hormones and bring balance back. You can continue to take the DIM for 3 months to support your liver detoxing the pills, excess estrogen from pregnancy, and other hormones (including cortisol from this potentially stressful period). After 3 months, stop the DIM, and you can continue to take the prenatals, of course, if you would like to prepare your body for pregnancy again in the next 1-3 years. Prenatal isn't just for when you're falling pregnant!! (You can listen to more on this here) 

I highly recommend taking these herbal tonics from my trusted friend Paul:

• Total detox
• Nettle
• Chaste Berry 
• Blood Bank 
• HERBS:
• https://peekaysshop.com/monica 
• CODE: MONICA20 

Using red light therapy would also be healing and rejuvenating to your womb whether you did a D&C or took the pills. - USE CODE: MONICAYATESHEALTH for $260 off

If you have a fabulous acupuncturist near you, I'd also recommend starting to go to one for emotional, energetic, and physical healing so that you have someone supporting you and your body during this time and bringing you back to equilibrium.

I know this isn't easy, and if you live somewhere where it's not easy to access pregnancy termination care, it can feel even more isolating, challenging, and painful. So, I hope this blog post helped you to know how to nourish yourself and your body during this time. 

And remember, you WILL get through this, and that baby will come back to you if you want him or her to.

xx Monica 

P.S. Don't forget to talk to your partner if you're in a relationship and be vulnerable. He is going through it, too, and sometimes we can forget that it's hard on the man (cause it's not happening to his body). I talk more about that in this episode.  

Also, reach out to trusted friends and family members who can hold the space for you and be a non-judgmental course of unconditional love. Because you did NOTHING WRONG, and you deserve to be seen, held, and honored with what you're going through, whether or not someone else would do the exacts ame as you. They are not you. 

*Please consult a functional medicine practitioner if you are unsure of further hormonal support for your body. This blog post is to be taken as general advice only.