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Trauma
Feminine Embodiment Isn’t What You Do — It’s How You Be
Let’s clear something up once and for all: Feminine embodiment isn’t a costume.
It’s not baking sourdough, floating around in silk dresses, pulling oracle cards, or being soft all the time. And it’s definitely not about living your entire life in “creative flow” while avoiding decisions, assertiveness, or structure.
That’s not embodiment — that’s performance.
What I see all the time is women trying to tick off an arbitrary checklist of "feminine traits":
- Wear flowy clothes
- Always lead with love
- Never say no
- Let everyone else make the plans
- Follow your intuition 24/7
- Be soft, open, nurturing at all times
And yet… they still can’t surrender. They still can’t let go of control. They still can’t relax in the presence of a powerful man.
Why? Because they’re performing femininity — not embodying it.
True Feminine Embodiment is When Your Life Feels Like Home
It’s not about what you’re doing. It’s about how you feel when you’re doing it.
You could be running a company, leading a team, making decisions all day… and if that lights you up — if you feel in alignment, lit from within, at home in your body — you’re in your feminine.
That’s me.
I’m the breadwinner. I run a global company. I travel, lead a team, launch offers, make fast decisions, host events, and hit 6-figure months while managing a growing family.
And yet — I am deeply in my feminine.
Feminine embodiment is a nervous system state. A home-in-your-body frequency. A deep feeling of safety, softness, and sovereignty.
True femininity is when you're so deeply in alignment with what your heart wants in a given season of life that you don't have to do anything to be feminine, you just are.
You can be working a 10-hour day, and if that’s lighting you up and you can soften and relax when you get home — then you're in your feminine.
But if you're working a 10-hour day without joy, and then unable to soften or surrender when you get home? That tells me your baseline isn’t feminine energy. You’re operating from your masculine, because it gives you the illusion of safety.
You Can Be BOTH: Discerning and Soft. Fierce and Receptive. Directed and Surrendered.
Women always ask me:
"But Monica... if I love planning the holidays or taking the lead at work, does that make me masculine?"
No. If it brings you joy — not control — it’s feminine.
But if you’re doing it because you don’t trust him to get it right…
If you’re constantly gripping because you’re afraid to let go…
If you’re secretly resentful that it’s all on your plate, but you don’t know how to receive…
That’s not your feminine. That’s your trauma response.
Feminine embodiment doesn’t mean you give up your edge.
It means your edge comes with depth, softness, and self-trust.
You lead when it’s true.
You let him lead when you want to soften.
You say no when it’s aligned.
You surrender when your body says yes.
You don’t outsource your power or your sense of safety — you become deeply connected to your body and your own wisdom.
Your Feminine Will Look Different in Every Season
Your feminine doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s.
There’s no formula. No box. No bulletproof routine.
Sometimes, your feminine will look like flowing around your home, naked and radiant.
Other times, it will look like spreadsheets, launch strategy, and cash injections — because you’re turned on by what you’re building.
Sometimes, it will look like full surrender to your man.
Other times, it will look like drawing a boundary with love and firmness.
Feminine embodiment is a felt sense of alignment. A knowing in your body. A return to your power, again and again, no matter what the world tells you.
That’s what I live and teach.
It’s not masculine for you to put your foot down and be assertive when needed. It’s called self-respect.
And that’s what this work delivers — when you’re ready to become her.
If this cracked something open in you, you need to be in the MUSE Masterclass. It’s my free deep-dive into feminine embodiment, magnetism, radiance, and the nervous system work that actually shifts your frequency.
Because your feminine is not a checklist — it’s a homecoming. And the women who do this work? They become magnetic AF.
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