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The Blog Archives
How to WANT to have sex
In fact, the pill dramatically reduces the levels of testosterone which is vital to both female and male libido. Stopping the pill doesn’t necessarily reverse the effects. Sad, I know. (1)
Other research has found the effects of the pill on sexual enjoyment and libido include diminished or complete loss of sexual interest and arousal, muted or non-existent orgasms, decreased the frequency of sexual intercourse and significantly more sexual pain reported by women taking the Pill compared with those who had never taken it. (2)
Additionally, a sign of low libido is having low estrogen which can happen due to stress, weight loss or stopping hormonal birth control. As estrogen rises during ovulation and your pre-ovulatory phase, this is the time when your libido will be at it's highest, and for good reasons - after all, that's when your fertile and our primal brain is only concerned about getting pregnant (3). Look out for a new free download I'll be offering very soon (when I get my ass into gear) for harnessing the superpowers of each phase of your cycle!
But here is a step in the right direction to wanting to pounce on your boyfriend or husband everytime he gets in the door (especially if he's carrying the shopping or cooking dinner ... am I right ladies?)
Foods for increasing libido:
- Maca has been shown to improve libido and to lower anxiety and depression, all of which are symptoms of low estrogen. (4)
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Eat foods that support your adrenals. To recharge your energy, go heavy on blue/black and yellow/orange foods which represent water and earth in Chinese Medicine – who important qualities for boosting libido and energy
- Blue/black food: black beans, black sesame seeds, adzuki beans, sea vegetables, dark chocolate
- Yellow/orange foods: carrots, oranges, sweet potatoes, apricots, squash, and pumpkin
- Incorporate more 'warming' foods like ginger and turmeric into your diet. These foods aid the flow of chi (the vital force) to circulate through your body, including your down-down region ;)
- Eat chocolate! One of the neurotransmitters released when you eat chocolate is called 'phenylethylamine'. It increases mood and decreases depression (and being depressed = low libido), and is even called the "love drug" because it causes your pulse rate to quicken, leading to a similar feeling to when someone is in love! (5)
- Try my cacao elixir for a banging combo of chocolate and maca to get you ready to roll!
Lifestyle changes to increase libido:
- Have sex. Yeah, I know, you don't feel like it. Well, the best way (tried and tested by yours truly too) is to have more sex. Having orgasms and that release of oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin helps to balance your hormone levels, boost (good) estrogen (actually called estradiol) and increase your libido. Try it and report back, please!
- Are you turned on in your life? If you aren't turned on by your everyday activities like work, play, exercise, food etc then how are you expected to be turned on in bed? When you hear the word 'pleasure' or being 'turned on', don't just think of it in terms of sex. Consider being turned on all day to boost your oxytocin, dopamine, and nitric oxide.
- Go to a yoga class. Allowing your feminine energy which is stored in your womb to move freely, helps to clear energy emotional or spiritual blockages that you have. I love going to a yoga class or doing a more sensual session at home because I feel so feminine after. Lots of hip opening and heart opening poses, please! Check out my playlist for activating your feminine.
- DANCE! Just like certain yoga moves, dancing allows your feminine energy to be moved and blockages to be released. It allows you to tap into your feminine essence and flow, just as we used to do in the caveman days.
- Allow yourself to RECEIVE pleasure. Society has kinda conditioned most women do not feel comfortable receiving pleasure. For most of us, the beliefs about self-indulgence, pleasure, and play have been passed down and many of us cannot receive pleasure from our friends and family, let alone our lover. From a biological standpoint, men derive their pleasure by giving. Men get turned on when we are turned on. So allow him to give you an orgasm, and for you to receive.
- Don't rush it! Most women cannot have an orgasm in 2 seconds like a man. Don't rush it, don't force it. Allow the build to be slow and stop thinking of the 'foreplay' as just foreplay. The foreplay is part of the sex. Also please stop thinking of it like a chore. It doesn't need to be rushed, and like my above point, men enjoy giving their woman an orgasm.
- Tell your man what you like. Not just even in the bedroom but all the other things that turn you on in life. Do you love it when he cooks? Cleans? Picks up the groceries? Gives you a back rub? Makes the bed? Wears that damn good cologne? Tell him! Remember what I said at the beginning...you need to be turned on in LIFE in order to be turned on in the bedroom. Women have different 'on' and 'off' switches that men (that's a whole other blog post that I will so very soon).
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