How to Be Discerning When Hiring a Coach or Healer

In a world where anyone can claim to be an expert online (hello, AI-generated content and marketing hacks), choosing the right coach or healer is more important than ever.

I’ve seen too many women tell me they’ve spent years and thousands of dollars on personal development with little to no results. And every time, my first question is:

Who are you working with?
Why are they not getting you results?

Because the truth is, not all coaches or healers are created equal.

A beautifully curated Instagram feed or a catchy marketing line doesn’t mean someone is actually equipped to guide you through deep transformation. Healing, embodiment, and leadership aren’t things you can fake—so if you’re investing in yourself, you need to make sure you’re investing in the right person.

Here’s how to know if someone is truly embodied, experienced, and aligned with the results you desire.

1. Watch Their Instagram Stories (Not Just Their Feed)

People can craft perfect feed posts, but their stories are where you see the real person behind the brand.

Ask yourself:

• Are they teaching in real-time, sharing value, and having real conversations?

• Do they show different aspects of their life, or is it just curated posts and reshared content?

• Can you feel their energy, authenticity and authority, or does something feel off?

If they only have two Instagram story types —one being reposting someone else's content and the other one is the reel they just posted — this can be a major red flag to me that they either don't know what to talk about / don't know how to educate you, OR their lives are not worth showing to you because they are not walking their talk and thus it's not easy for them to put our aligned marketing.

What are they showing outside of the perfectly curated posts on their feed?? And I want you to take it a step further and FEEL into their energy behind their stories... not just what they’re saying or showing, but how it feels in your body when they’re doing it.

Side note: Of course people take time off Instagram stories — I do too. But you also notice that I am on Instagram stories often. I’m talking to you all the time, I am showing you different pieces of my life, I have a podcast so you can hear me talk for an hour straight (over 350 times loll) and I'm showing up CONSISTENTLY.

These sorts of things can help you to feel my energy, to feel my tone of voice, to figure out if you like the way I talk and teach in “real life,” to decide if you’re inspired by my life or not, and to get a feel for who I am BEHIND my curated feed posts.

This also isn't to say that you need to show yourself taking a shit on the toilet (LOL), because obviously, privacy is something that you get to maintain for yourself. BUT, you can still show a lot of your personality and your integrity without destroying your privacy. 

2. Look for Long-Form Content (Podcasts, YouTube, Instagram Lives, etc.)

Instagram captions can only go so deep. If someone is a true expert in their field, they should have:

• Podcast episodes where they share in-depth knowledge

• YouTube videos that give a real feel for their teaching style

• Instagram Lives where they’re going deep into a topic and answering questions

Why does this matter? Because real expertise takes time to explain.

Does it feel warm and inviting when they're talking and are they able to adjust their teachings based on the question/person/situation? Or, does it feel like they're talking AT you and shoving shit down your throat with no space for being flexible?

Someone who truly knows their craft will be able to adapt their teachings, explain things clearly, and hold space in a way that feels natural.

3. Do They Have Social Proof—AND Is It Recent?

This is a big one.

Testimonials don’t lie. And if someone is great at what they do, people will talk about them.

Look for:

• Recent testimonials (if they’re only using the same ones from years ago, that’s a red flag)

• Evidence of consistent transformations

And if they’re new and don’t have testimonials yet? Then THEY should be their own social proof.

Are they sharing their own transformation, their journey, and what they’ve embodied? Are they actually walking their talk?

4. Does Their Business Look Legit?

This is especially important if you’re hiring a business coach.

• Are their systems professional, organized, and smooth?

• Do they have clear, functioning links, easy-to-navigate programs, and high-quality branding?

• Or does everything feel half-finished, messy, or thrown together?

A coach helping you build a thriving, successful business should be running a thriving, successful business themselves. Simple as that.

5. Do They Show You Their Life & Embodiment?

Integrity is everything when hiring a coach or healer.

If someone is teaching feminine embodiment, but they’re still constantly in hustle mode and burnout… 🚩
If someone is teaching somatic healing, but they’re still trapped in their own dysregulated patterns… 🚩
If someone is teaching wealth energetics, but they’re constantly talking about financial stress… 🚩

You should be able to see that they are truly living what they teach.

No, this doesn’t mean they need to share every detail of their personal life. But there should be some level of transparency. You should have a sense of who they are, what they stand for, and what their life actually looks like.

6. Do They Show Up Consistently?

When someone is truly passionate about what they do, you’ll feel it.

• They’ll be teaching regularly—not just when they have something to sell.

• They’ll be adding value to your life long before you pay them.

• They’ll be engaging with their audience and building real relationships.

Because the truth is? The best coaches and healers don’t just pop up when they want your money. They’re here, leading, guiding, and serving because it’s who they are.

The Bottom Line: Trust Your Gut

Your body knows the truth.

✨ How do you feel when you consume their content?
✨ Does something feel off, or do you feel deeply seen and expanded?
✨ Do they activate something in you that makes you trust them?

Listen, I get it that it can be scary to invest in people / programs these days because of shady people and the ridiculous scams out there. That stuff is real, and your fear is valid!!

But one of the greatest things about social media — even though there can be sooo much smoke and mirrors — is that you really do get to feel into who someone is before you hire them.

You can sniff out the bullshit and figure out who is legit by tuning in and cultivating this level of discernment (if it’s hard for you to feel your intuition, then let’s heal your trauma in Queen Alchemy and/or the Immersion!!!), and if you dig a bit deeper beyond just pretty photos and captivating words. 

FEEL into it. Look for the proof. Trust yourself and seriously follow all of these steps before hiring me too!!! I dare you! 😉

Comb through my 400+ podcast episodes, day in the life vlogs on my YouTube, I’m on stories alllll the time, and highlights upon highlights of social proof on my Instagram and testimonial Instagram

…I literally can’t hide anything at this point — so ENJOY the digging LOL! 🕵🏼‍♀️ 

You owe it to yourself to be discerning, so I hope you put these tips into use!

And if you’re ready to work with a coach who embodies this work?

Start your transformation here for $149.
 

READ. SIMILAR BLOG HERE: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/business/the-drama-of-someone-copying-me