Can Women Be Feminine and Still Be the Breadwinner? What Every High-Achieving Woman Needs to Know.

This blog post features an excerpt from my New York Times bestselling book, Becoming HER, where I dive into one of the most powerful questions modern women are asking: “Can I be in my feminine and still be the breadwinner?” 

Whether you're a successful, high-achieving woman navigating relationships, polarity, or feminine embodiment, my hope is that this will help you understand why true masculine provision isn’t just about money—it’s about presence, leadership, and emotional safety.

“We are living in an age where women do not need men to provide financially for them. We are looking for much more than that. We have realized that money isn't enough. A truly healthy and long-lasting partnership is based on trust, intimacy, time, love, attention, and devotion, not on money and success.

Now, ensure that you are meeting men who have the same growth mindset as you if you are a highly driven and successful woman. Otherwise, the relationship will be destined to fail.

But stop thinking that you need to have a man who makes more money than you. Instead, think about the truly masculine traits that a healthy man possesses, like devotion, direction, leadership, loyalty, boundaries, trust, ambition, and protectiveness. A healthy man cherishes and adores the feminine and wants to take the burden off her.

Through this lens, you can start to see all the ways in which a man might provide for you in ways other than money. How does he take the burden off you? How does he lead you? How does he control the situation so that you don't have to be the one thinking about it? How does he teach you and protect you?" — From Becoming HER [Ch. 9: "Can Women Be Feminine and Breadwinners?" (starts at page 141)]

We’ve entered an era where women no longer need a man for financial survival, but that doesn’t mean we don’t desire the masculine in other deeply human ways.

As high-achieving women, we often think we need a partner who “matches” us dollar for dollar. But what if that’s not actually the match that matters most? What if what you really want is a man who:

• Handles the logistics so your brain can rest

• Holds boundaries so you feel safe to melt

• Carries the weight of decisions so you don’t have to live in masculine overdrive

• Holds your emotions and lets you feel safe to be in your feminine?
  
  

A healthy man doesn’t need to earn more than you. He needs to know how to lead you, protect you, and claim you in a way that takes the burden off your shoulders and places it where it belongs—in the energy of healthy masculine provision.

Because providing isn’t always about money. It’s about presence. Direction. Devotion. Protection.

And yes, sometimes paying the f*cking bill so your nervous system can breathe.

If you’ve ever wrestled with being the successful woman who still craves to be led, softened, adored… my course The Feminine Female Breadwinner was made for you. Inside, we dive deep into how to stay in your feminine while holding big goals, how to invite masculine leadership without self-abandoning, and how to create polarity even when you're the one bringing home the money. You don’t have to choose between power and softness—you get to have both.